Solipsist's submission diary

Anniversary orgasm

2007-10-12T02:11:00.001-07:00

She was jerking me off in the shower (not uncommon), but when I said 'Mistress may I please come', she said 'no', and continued. I fought as long as I could, then gasped 'Mistress, please stop, please I can't control it', she said 'yes, you will. You won't come.' But then I started to come.

She grabbed my cock and squeezed hard. She later said that She really enjoyed feeling my cock throb as I came, and it all backing up behind her iron grip. Meantime I was squeezing my PC muscle as hard as I could, trying to prevent orgasm. And failing.

She let go of my cock, and I pumped semen over her thigh a couple of times. Then she kissed me, and said "happy anniversary". Then she stroked my cock as though to milk the cum after an orgasm.

"You really need to practice those Kegel exercises." She said as we climbed out of the shower.

Suffering for Her

2007-10-12T02:11:00.000-07:00

You are dressed as a classic dominatrix, thigh-high boots, corset and a leather g-string. I am kneeling naked on the floor in front of you.

"So, slave, I'm letting you make a choice. What do you want ?" you ask. I look up, uncertain. It's not often that you ask my opinion in anything.

"Go ahead," you say.

"Em," I clear my throat, "May I go down on you please, Mistress ?"

"You want to lick my pussy, do you ? Do you think your pathetic tongue would make me come ?" I sense that no answer is really required.

"I think you're only really worthy of licking my arsehole, slave. I don't think you could turn me on enough to come with your tongue on my clit."

"Please, Mistress ?"

We both know that I have spent hours at a time worshipping your pussy, and that you have trained me in exactly how to lick you, to bring you quickly to orgasm or to build so slowly that you scream when you come, and my tongue is so numb that I can't talk afterwards. But you also know that this is one of my greatest desires and often deny it, taking your pleasure in other ways.

"Well ... you'll need to get me interested first. Lets see if you can get me aroused and if I think you've earned it I might let you lick me."

You take a seat in an easy chair at one side of the room.

"Fetch the cane."

I quickly scurry off on my knees to where the canes are kept. There are several, but I know that when you ask for 'the cane' you are referring to the longest, nastiest one in the rack. I bring it back to where you are seated, and offer it to you.

"Ask me."

"Please Mistress, will you cane me ?"

"What ?"

Please Mistress, will you cane me until I cry ? Will you cane me until I howl in pain, and beg you to stop, please Mistress will you ..."

"Well, since you ask so nicely, slave, I just might.", you say with a sarcastic smile on your face. "Lets start with 40, shall we."

I get into position, bent at the waist, hands grasping my ankles. After each stroke, I say "thank you Mistress", and mean it.

After 40 of your hardest strokes I am fighting back tears, my backside and upper thighs are on fire, and I am struggling to maintain my position.

"Come here slave," you command. I kneel in front of you as you tower over me, tapping the cane in one hand. You point to your leather covered crotch.

"Come closer." I raise my head and move closer. "Take a deep breath. Do you think I'm turned on yet ?"

I inhale and catch a faint whiff of your scent. My cock stiffens. But you're definitely not fully aroused yet.

"No, Mistress."

"Well, what do you think we could do about that ?"

I take a deep breath. "May I have more strokes, please Mistress ?"

"Well that might help. I don't really see any sign that those got through to you. Lets try another 60, shall we ?"

Half way through this set, I am sure that I can't take any more. I am moaning involuntarily in pain, and my knees are starting to buckle. It feels like my flesh must have been cut open. How I endure the next 30 strokes I have no idea, but you take your time, seeming to enjoy my obvious suffering. But still every stroke comes as hard as those that preceeded it, and I howl my pain as I gasp "Thank you Mistress" after each one.

After this second set, you take your seat again.

"Glass of wine, slave."

My bruised arse protests as I scurry off to the kitchen to pour your wine, and I limp slightly as I return and place it on the table beside your chair. I take my place before you, my backside stinging abominably---I long to rub it but know that I'm not allowed.

After a couple of sips of wine you put a hand to your pussy, and snake a finger inside your g-string. It is clear to me from where I kneel that you're starting to get wet. You pretend to examine your finger.

"Nothing. You'll have to do better than that, slave. Maybe some more ?"

I feel that terrible/deliscious knot in my stomach that I get when my limits are being stretched. I really don't think I could take another 20 strokes of the cane. Still, I pick it up and offer it to you in both hands.

"Please will you cane me again, Mistress ?"

I hear the words but I don't quite believe what I'm saying. You pause for a moment, then say "No, perhaps later. I think I'd rather play with your other bits first."

You take me over to the bondage table, and tie me down on my back. You attach my ankles to a spreader bar, draw it upwards and clip it to a chain dangling from the ceiling, lifting and spreading my legs, leaving my arsehole and cock and balls exposed and vulnerable. You pull a blindfold over my eyes, and I hear you pulling a variety of toys out.

The next thing I feel is a cold pressure on my arsehole. Something lubricated is trying for entry. I feel you pushing something inside me, and I try to relax and allow it in. But it seems that no matter how much I relax, the intruder is wider. The pressure you are applying is unrelenting, and millimeter by millimeter the monster dildo stretches me open. I am panting in pain by the time the ridged head finally pushes past my outer anal opening, and I find I am crying out as the pain does not dissipate. I desperately want the giant intruder removed, but that's not your plan, and you keep slowly pushing it into my rectum. By the time the dildo is far enough in that I can't push it out, you stop forcing it in, and after a moment I feel your hand stroking my hair and hear your voice close in my ear.

"Shh. Shh... " you say soothingly. "It's alright. You want me to hurt you don't you ?"

I take a few deep breaths, and manage to control myself a bit.

"Yes, Mistress, thank you for hurting me", I say with difficulty. She strokes my face.

"Thank you Mistress," I manage to utter, before I feel you between my legs and pushing the dildo further inside me. This time there's no gentleness, you're pushing it in as hard as you can, splitting me in two, voilating me with what feels like a monster dildo. As I cry out in pain, you start fucking me with the dildo, a burning pain that never quite turns into pleasure.

You stop---after how long I don't know because time has stopped for me---and pull the dildo out, leaving me burning and aching. I feel you mounting the table, and your arse descending on my face.

"Lick" you say sharply.

I stick my tongue out and am greeted with the bitter-sweet taste of your arsehole. As I start licking, I feel you lean forward, and feel your fingers inside my hole. It is a couple of seconds before I realise that your fingers must have been smeared liberally with Dencorub. The pain quickly builds, and particularly after the brutal preperation, it becomes overwhelming, and it is all I can do not to scream.

"I feel your bottom wiggle on my face, as if to get my attention.

"Don't stop, fuckface." you say.

The pain in my anus builds to a crescendo as I struggle to keep licking your arsehole. A couple of times, the pain becomes too much and I lose concentration, crying out and arching my back. You grab my hair and force my face into your backside, and I remember my purpose and keep licking. Eventually you climb off my face, but the pain still burns inside me.

"Well that was a pretty pathetic effort," you say sharply, although I suspect you had a very nice orgasm while my tongue was rimming you. "I think I might grant your request now ... and give you another 60 strokes with that cane."

You untie me and take your seat again, as I fetch you more wine and kneel at your feet holding the cane up for you to use when it eventually pleases you.

This time as you cane my ass I cannot maintain my composure and my position, and fall to my knees 5 times. You punish this lack of discipline by repeating each stroke I can't stay upright for. On the 45th stroke, as I fall to my knees for the seventh time you bend down and say softly to me,

"You can't do this, can you ? We can stop now. You're really only worthy to lick my arsehole, aren't you ?"

"Please, Mistress," I sob, "I can do it, I'll try harder. Please let me worship your pussy."

You deliver a smarting crack to my cheek.

"Then get the fuck up then, you useless wanker," you yell, "don't keep me waiting."

After the caning is finished, I am sobbing, oblivious, and you relax again in the easy chair as I try to regain my composure.

"I know," you say, "I've got the perfect way to find out how much you really want to lick my pussy."

You go over to a cupboard, and come back with what looks like a rope. You have me kneel on all fours as you tie a loop very tightly around my balls. You attach the other end to a bolt in the floor, and I notice that most of its length is actually bunjee cord, or some similar elastic.

You take your place on the chair again, shift back in the seat, and spread your legs.

"Well, come and get it," you say with a cruel smile on your face.

I crawl over towards my prize, your glorious pussy, glistening with the juices of your arousal. As I approach you I feel the cord around my balls start to pull tight, and by the time I am two inches or so away from heaven, it feels like my balls are about to be wrenched from my body completely. Your scent is intoxicating, and I push myself forward again, but before I can reach you, the pain in my balls becomes too extreme and I can't go any further.

"Aww ... " you say, mock sympathetic, "And I thought you wanted to lick me ? You haven't changed your mind have you ?"

I try again, trying to put my stretched balls out of my mind, and by reaching my tongue out as far as it will go, make contact with your inner labia. The pain recedes slightly, and I manage to push myself a few millimeters closer, enough to very very lightly lick you.

"I don't think much of your technique," you say after a few minutes, "that's never going to get me off. More pressure, slave."

I edge forward again, and as the pain in my balls rises to yet another level (surely they're going to get pulled clean off any minute), I manage to apply slightly more pressure.

"That's better, but slower now, slave I wouldn't want to come too soon."

I slow my tongue strokes down, savouring the delicious cruelty of your last order, but wondering how I'm going to stand this for another minute, let alone the half-hour it could take you to reach a leisurely orgasm. I sense that you are responding to my attentions, when all of a sudden you shift backwards in the seat, placing yourself another 2 inches further from my tongue.

"Oh that's much more comfortable," you say, "continue."

We both know that two more inches forward would tear my poor aching balls from my body completely, but by now I'm hooked, so I try. I get about half an inch forward before the pain in my balls doubles again and I cry out. I can't go any further, and start to edge backwards.

"Don't you dare go away," you smile down at my tear stained face, "don't you want to lick me ?"

"Please Mistress, I can't go any closer."

"I'm not interested in your miserable excuses," you say, Get that tongue in here NOW," and you punctuate the sentence with a finger on your clit.

I lean forwards again, but still can't close the gap, and I can't stop crying out. But after a minute or so it becomes plain I won't be pleasing Mistress in person today.

"Pathetic," you sneer. "But stay just where you are, and I'll let you watch."

My balls are being torn from my body, and I'm an inch away from your glorious pussy, and all I can do is watch as your fingers caress your clit, and you come to a magnificent orgasm. I am tantalised by the scent of your arousal, tormented by the fact that I haven't given you the pleasure I wished to, half out of my mind with the pain in my overstretched balls, but content that at least my suffering might have given you pleasure.

Suspension

2007-10-01T02:21:00.000-07:00

I got suspended for the first time last night. After it was over, MF the Dom who rigged it, asked me how I found the experience of being suspended. I gave some rather brief answers, but here's a longer one.

There were 4 of us in the house, and we had been talking, drinking coffee and eating a very late lunch. Mistress said "we'd better be on our way" (we had a 3 hour drive to get home). MF and Ms Gorgeous Redhead said "oh, but you can't go now. We were hoping to do some suspension on your sub."

Not long after this, I was standing naked underneath the hoist, with MF starting to wind a long piece of cotton sash cord around my chest. Mistress and Ms Gorgeous were standing watching, rummaging through their respective toys to find things to use on me later. The situation itself was enough to put me into a mild trance. I stood still and silent, as the rope harness wound itself further and further down my body, not too tight, but enough to immobilise me. The process of being cocooned started to focus me inwards, and bring my thoughts purely into the present.

The two Dommes circled me as MF worked a second rope into the harness, drawing my legs together and making me unsteady on my feet. Mistress pressed up against me, fondling my cock and balls to hardness, kissing me deeply and then biting my bottom lip hard, pulling away with my lip between Her teeth until I was moaning in pain. Ms Gorgeous hit my backside with a paddle, directly on top of the impressive bruises from our scene the night before, and before I knew it, my hand involuntarily moved to protect my ass. "That hand better not be trying to protect your backside." "Sorry Ma'am" "I know I'm hitting you on top of last night's bruises. And I know exactly how much it hurts. Don't you dare try to stop me." And She hit me again, and again. Mistress grabbed the tip of a nipple and squeezed till I winced.

MF said in a disgusted tone "He'd better not slime on me," and Mistress grabbed me, alternately smearing my pre-cum across the tip of my cock, biting my bottom lip in more vicious kisses, and torturing my nipples. Then Ms Gorgeous showed me the knife. Sharp, gleaming metal. A serious knife. A six inch blade, over an inch across at its widest. She took out an alcohol swab and started to clean it.

Then I was blindfolded, and the world became pure sensation.

They tipped me over, slowly, until I was lying on my face. It started with being pushed, my balance slowly vanishing. I fought for a while, my body rigid, until I started to understand the control provided by the ropes. Eventually, at what felt like 60 degrees from the vertical, I gave in and found myself in a crouch. MF instructed the Mistresses, and soon I was stretched out on the floor, as they continued to rig the suspension.

Through this process, the feeling of objectification, being simply a body that they were using intensified.

Eventually MF announced that I would start slipping backwards. I felt the ropes start to tighten, the chain of the winch clank, and I started sliding. As I started to lift off the ground, two sensations competed for my attention: the intense pain of ropes digging in as they supported my weight, and a feeling of almost weightlessness, of being totally disoriented in space. The ropes over my shoulder were the most intense, and (though the photos show that I was level with the ground) I felt like I was tipped forward by at least 45 degrees.

The feeling of the harness digging into my skin and muscles dominated my attention all the time I was suspended. Paying attention to any of the other sensations and emotions was akin to having a conversation while listening to a live band: it had to shout to be heard. I was vaguely aware that I was moaning softly with every outward breath, and at one point I heard MF say "turn the music down, listen to the noises he's making," which they did.

They swung me around, and though I was aware of motion, I had no idea how far or how often.

I was lost in a world of pure sensation. My sensory inputs were overloaded, too many nerves competing for my attention. Ms Gorgeous leant in close to me, and told me to relax my head. The shoulder ropes dug in even deeper, but the reduced muscle strain helped. I mentally checked the rest of my body, relaxing tense muscles (most of them), and this helped me process the sensation. Other sensations pulled me in and out of focus. A hand in my hair. My feet being pummelled. A caress of my cock.

I became aware of sensation on my back, hands and something cold. I noticed that a voice was speaking, and eventually worked out it was asking me something. Did I know what they were doing, what it was that I was feeling ? I had to force myself to pay attention, to push the pain of the harness into the background. The knife. They were running the knife over my skin. Gently, it had to be gently, but I could feel a point of sensation moving across my back. Mistress and Ms Gorgeous took turns, their hands steadying me as the knife ran in patterns across my skin.

Eventually I heard Ms Gorgeous say to Mistress "Now lets do one deeper cut. ", and they discussed where to place it. They cut across my lower back, just above my tattoo. It felt hot, but I had no idea how deeply they had cut. Sensation had lost its meaning, was I bleeding, how could I tell ? But I did know one place where sensation was building. My cock. For a time I felt like I was building to an orgasm, like I would come any moment without being touched.

And then they started flogging me. On my front, from underneath. On my cock and balls.

But now there was a new sensation rising to the front of my consciousness. My arm was going to sleep, and had, I realised, been doing so for some time. I thought hard - I didn't want it to end so soon, but then again it didn't feel good. So I called "yellow" (my first ever safeword), and asked them to check circulation in my arm. Within moments I was lying on a surface, a massage table. And shortly after I was cuddled up in the arms of my Mistress, exhilarated, safe and utterly blissed out.

"In the clover"

2007-09-20T15:43:00.001-07:00

I love my Mistress :)

Exploring the range of a new cane

2007-08-05T16:06:00.001-07:00

I came home from work for another hour on Friday, because Mistress said she wanted to work on my marks again. You can see that the previous days marks have faded to just a few faint bruises. For this session, She decided to pull my cock back between my legs, so that She could pay it some attention.

She started with Her black 'spaghetti' and baby suede 'keychain' floggers, reddening my cheeks and allowing the tip of the whip to deliver stings to my exposed cock and balls. This was definitely a good time to be lying helpless across the new bench, as some of the heavier strokes on my balls would have made me jump in any other position.

In between groups of strokes, She took time out to tease me with Her fingertips, before starting on the more serious part of the session.

You can see from this pic how the vertical strokes from the whips complement the horizontal strokes from the canes.

Mistress is still getting used to the two new canes we bought a few weeks ago. Until today, She had been content to use them quite lightly, putting just enough effort into them to get a red mark and a noise out of me. Today (She told me afterwards) She decided to see what putting some more effort behind them would do. As you can see some of the strokes have nearly broken the skin, and the sensations were heavenly :). The marks you see here were achieved in just over 10 minutes.

Before and after

2007-08-02T16:40:00.000-07:00

We had a mid day session yesterday, using the new spanking bench with one pair of legs collapsed. This position places my backside in a position where She can strike almost vertically with the cane. Here are before and after shots.

Hopes, dreams, desires

2007-07-28T18:45:00.000-07:00

Things I want to experience before I die.

I want to lick Mistress to an orgasm while she sits on my face and whips, canes or squeezes my balls so painfully that I have to struggle past the pain to keep licking.
I want to be go to a party, naked except for my leash and ball stretcher, with Mistress dressed in a skin-tight latex dress and thigh-high boots.
I want to be caned until I cry and my backside bleeds.
I want to suck cock while my Mistress watches.
I want to be used as a toilet for an entire weekend.
I want to spend an hour or more with my face between Her buttocks.
I want to serve as sex slave for a whole room full of people.
I want to feel Owned.

Welts, aches and bruises

2007-07-28T17:09:00.001-07:00

Friday lunchtime saw another 15 minutes of focused stress release. Focused on my backside alone, in deference to the state of my balls after the previous day's attentions!

Now, 2 days later, the redness has gone, but the bruises are quite clear. The ache from the bruises on my ass is similar to the ache in my balls from our session the day before. Mistress says that both of them will get worse in the coming week.

Ritual resumes

2007-07-26T06:09:00.000-07:00

Mistress has decided that I'm getting too stressed, and so She has reinstated our lunchtime ritual. On Monday I came home for half an hour, and 15 minutes of stress release was applied.

The ball stretcher you can see me still wearing was used to suspend a selection of fishing weights from while I was being caned. Mistress has decided that since it took so many weights to 'get my attention' this time, next time she will start with one of the diving weights, and then use the fishing sinkers to 'fine tune'.

The marks look quite impressive close up, and I still feel some twinges today, 3 days later.

Today I also came home for some stress release, but this time She had me lie on my back on the bed, and attach the 'ball presenter'. Since She wrote about it on Her blog, I have attached eye-bolts to the 4 corners, and so She locked my cuffed wrists to the board. This time I was treated to 15 minutes with a tiny suede whip, a light cane, and Her favourite toy, the wartenburg wheel.

As you can see my balls are going an impressive shade of purple.

Most of our CBT play to date has been with stretching and compression, and this was our heaviest impact-play session to date. It brought up some powerful feelings afterwards, which I will go into more detail about in Her forthcoming blog entry.

Seven Random Facts

2007-07-11T07:56:00.000-07:00

Like a lot of people who participate in the meme phenomenon, I'm not entirely sure what I think of it, but since Destiny was kind enough to tag me, how could I refuse.

Random facts about me:

1. My BDSM internet identity comes from Iain M Banks' Against a Dark Background
2. My favourite programming language is Haskell
3. I enjoy the music of Robert Fripp
4. Anal sex is one of my favourite activities
5. I once sang in the concert hall of the Sydney Opera House
6. Later this year I will present my first paper at an international conference
7. I have taken 4 of the 5 Buddhist lay vows

I tag:

Mistress 160
Mrs Claudia
Miss Bonnie

And this is the obligatory part of the meme:
The rules are simple: “Each player starts with 7 random facts/habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to write their own blog post with their 7 things as well as these rules. You need to tag 7 others and list their names on your blog. Remember to leave a comment for them letting them know they have been tagged and to read your blog.”

Computer aided submission

2007-06-16T16:34:00.000-07:00

For those who consider BDSM to be all about physical sensation, computers and BDSM may not seem like a natural combination. To those for whom BDMS is more (or even a bit) about submission, computers make an ideal companion for people by themselves either short or long term. And not simply as a communication medium.

I first came across BDSM-oriented software on the 'net in early 2002, when I was home alone for extended periods across the space of 8 months or so. TeaseMePlz's mybdsm site (the forerunner to orgasmdenial.com) contained 3 interesting ideas. Firstly, there was an orgasm permission page, where a simple javascript application would act as the voice of a celebrity 'Mistress', lead you through a quick process of asking permission for orgasm, getting you to the edge one or more times, then saying 'yes' or 'no' randomly according to a fixed probability. Some Mistresses were stricter than others, with probabilities ranging from 50/50 to 1 in 7, and the system used cookies to ensure that you couldn't ask permission more than once per day.

The second innovation on this page was also a little javascript application, that would tease you according to a somewhat random schedule. You would be instructed to stroke at different speeds for varying lengths of time, and either permitted breaks if you got too close to orgasm or told to keep stroking but not cum. These were interesting initially but got dull pretty quickly.

Much more enduring, however, was the concept of a webtease, which later became extremely popular on orgasmdenial.com, and is now featured on sites such as milovana.com. While there is certainly nothing inherently limiting in the medium, and some more recent projects (eg teaserator) are extending the potential, webteases tend to be very 'linear' in form.

A very different direction is taken by VirtualMaster, which has been in development for a long time and has been the inspiration for several other projects. Whereas webteases and the like are for the entertainment of people with a tease and denial fetish (more or less), the aim of this system is nothing less than to take over your life, and to allow a Master or Mistress to remotely control a submissive with a reasonable amount of certainty that they are doing what they are told.

VirtualMaster is driven by a script created by a dominant, and periodically gives instructions to the user and requires acknowledgement of the instruction. The script can be password protected and encrypted so that it cannot be modified or read by its user, and the program can periodically send logs to the dom/me so that they can verify that the sub is doing what they are told.

For example, the script might specify that the sub must wake up between 7 and 7:30 am. If the sub doesn't tell the program that they are awake at this time, the program will log the fact for later reporting, and may assign a punishment. Once the sub is awake and has reported in, the script may assign them tasks. 'Eat breakfast - you have 15 minutes', for example. The sub must report in 15 minutes later.

While this may seem rather unexciting, the program actually seems to take on a personality, and does tend to produce compliance. I have only ever used scripts provided for mass consumption, but having a real person at the other end of the program writing the script and checking your compliance would make it a very powerful experience. Virtual Master is being actively developed.

I will write about other programs in later posts.

New toy

2007-05-21T15:54:00.002-07:00

We have a new toy.

Don't you think this looks neat ?

This is my first ever serious woodwork project. It's more strenuous than it looks.

The strain on arms and shoulders is apparent in this pic - I think the wrist attachments need to be closer together. I spent 15 minutes in position while we took the pics, and I think 5 minutes more would have been my limit.

So you are kept in an all-fours pose. Your head is forced downwards and you really can't move much at all.

Apart from making a secure attachment point, cock and balls are exposed and vulnerable. The top of this upright presses against the pubic bone. It's also designed so you could put the cock across the top of the post, and just be attached by the balls. They're in a perfect place to be attacked with a riding crop.

It all comes apart. The uprights are attached with mortise and tenon joints, fixed in place by dowels that can be removed to take it apart. Possibly the shoulder strain could be relieved by removing the neck post and allowing your head to rest on the floor.

Future enhancements will include another upright post to allow a butt plug to be fixed in place, and some eye hooks to allow ropes to be tied strategically, clover clamps to be attached and tensed, balls to be stretched etc.

The intensity increases

2007-04-16T17:00:00.000-07:00

This pic shows an extra layer of marks on top of the bruises from the previous post.
We are continuing the 'short sharp' sessions during the day, and increasing the intensity. Mistress has been focussing on two items, a short, thick cane braided in leather, and a long heavy rattan cane. The results are as follows.

Mistress waxed my backside on the weekend - makes it a whole lot more photogenic.

A new week and a new ritual

2007-04-01T06:06:00.001-07:00

For this week's canings, Mistress has introduced a new ritual. I come home and strip off, then I go into the lounge to wait while She gets ready. She told me that there was a drink prepared for me, and this is what I found waiting. So I knelt on the mat and lent forward to drink from my bright pink dog bowl. This was a great help in getting into a submissive mood for what was about to come.

After effects

2007-04-01T06:01:00.000-07:00

This is my backside 2 days after the previous session.

Lunchtime canings (part 2)

2007-03-15T16:52:00.000-07:00

This took place 2 days after the session from part 1.

Lunchtime canings (part 1)

2007-03-15T16:29:00.000-07:00

First lunchtime

The marks at the top are from the rawhide cane we bought from Madam S in San Francisco. It stings like fury and leaves lovely track marks.

The marks in the middle where some blood is pooling under the skin are from the heavy rattan cane.

This angle shows the underside. The mark half way up at the left hand edge of the picture was the most painful one of the session.

Lock me up! But how ?

2007-03-11T19:02:00.000-07:00

It is now over 6 weeks since I last came, and having been on a steady diet of CBT for the last 2 weeks (as followers of Mistress160's blog will have seen) my balls are getting *very* achy. We definitely have a chastity device on 'the list' of sex toys to buy, but after reading some recent experiences, we've come to the conclusion that you need a piercing to have one that's secure. And what's the point of a chastity device that isn't secure.

Which brings me to the dilemma. For a long time I've been interested in getting a Prince Albert piercing. We agreed a while ago (when I got my right nipple pierced) that I could have it for my next '0' birthday (2014). But can I wait that long before getting a chastity device ? Do we risk get one of the ones that don't work (well after all one of them might work for me) or will Mistress relent and let me get the piercing sooner ?

Decisions decisions. Not mine, though. Hers.

I ache.

And I love it.